Rehired! (My Personal Story Part II)

When I shared my story in the blog post entitled "How I Bounced Back from the Sack", I was overwhelmed by the support I received. I alluded to the fact that there was some upheaval at work at the time that post was published, without exactly divulging all the details.

It is a twisted story with many lessons. By the time this is posted it would have been around two weeks since I (re)started my new job. Confused? let me explain.

First week at my 'new' job

I have been at my company for six years working in different departments, but within the same organisation. In June 2015, I was awarded a year's secondment (a secondment is when you are on loan to a department or organisation for a fixed period of time, whilst your original position is kept warm for you.), and around three months into my one years secondment, I was told that my contract would be extended for another year. I was ECSTATIC. Not only was the position a MASSIVE step up from what I was doing originally,I also loved my new team, and the job offered a better work life balance.

So from when I was given the good news until early this year, I was very much in the knowledge and the belief that I would be sitting comfy in my new position for a little longer than anticipated.

How naive.

My years' contract in pictures

I think it was February or March this year, my stony faced manager took me into her office to tell me that she was sorry, but HR had rejected her application to keep me on for a year longer, and come June I would have to go back to my original post.

I. Was. Floored.

From then, I was consumed by thoughts of going back to a role that I thought I had grown out of. I thought about colleagues that joined my organisation after me, and had basically frog leaped over me to higher positions. I couldn't help but think about all I had poured into two degrees; about the number of  "we regret to inform you..." emails and the repetitive advice to "keep trying".

After getting over the initial disappointment, I went into "fight mode". This meant upgrading my LinkedIn account and sending out a ton of emails and CVs, which proved a futile exercise. It was as if heaven had shut the "career" door in my face, and God was looking down, and laughing in hysterics whilst I chased my own tail.

June was approaching fast, and as the countdown wilted down from months to weeks and finally days, I was becoming more panic stricken. My search for a new job became more frantic, and less focused. Because I was desperate, I almost willing to sell my soul for absolutely anything. The feeling of dread in my chest was becoming unbearable. And then June 22nd arrived.

This story is kind of long, so we'll continue next time :-) In the meantime, please comment below with any job hunting tips you may have. 

First Year At University? Let's Chat!

This is from a post that I published last year. However I thought it would be useful to repost an updated version as we are at "that time" again!

The advice I have here is a result of my own personal experiences in university. I have gone through the process twice so I know what I am talking about.Trust me. For those of you reading in the US, I am referring to what you call "college". 

Here are my tips for new university students.

1.Make a note of your coursework deadlines. Put them in your diary, and add in reminders a month, two weeks and one week prior to the due date. Better still, invest in a yearly planner you can put up on your wall. I say this because your lecturer will probably only give you the dates once. I studied French and Linguistics at Queen Mary, and made the mistake of not paying attention to the due date of my “Language in the USA” coursework deadline. The result was a rushed piece of work, hastily put together on the afternoon it was due. It attained no more than a C grade!

2. Find out how your faculty prefers for you to do your referencing and stick to it. Here is a very good guide from the Anglia Ruskin university.

3. I stayed at home whilst at university as the distance between my house and campus was too short for me to qualify for student accommodation. If you are in this position, strike a good friendship with someone in living on campus, who you can trust. You will be grateful for this on nights after long hours spent in the library, or partying!

4. Space out your schedule and give yourself some room to breathe.I remember in my first year cramming my Mondays with six hours worth of lectures  (yes! with no break). The result was knackering! I sometimes even skipped my last class altogether - not good at all.

5. If you are taking a class such as literature, or any other class that requires studying from one book for the entire semester get your own copy – even if it’s second-hand. Your campus library will normally only have a few copies of that particular book, and you may not be able to keep it for the whole semester.

Good luck with university. There is so much more you will learn besides the content of your lectures. Work hard, have fun and make friends!

I hope you find these tips useful. Please share any additional tips you might have below. 

"Good Traditional Values" that the Empowered Woman Must Shake Off.

Today's topic is coming straight from the heart so please forgive me if this entry is a little bit disjointed. The last few weeks have been quite full on and it all came to a head last week which resulted in my body finally giving up and becoming overrun with the flu! 

The blogging world can be a glossy place sometimes, with our photos edited to perfection and exciting updates of holidays and nights out at plush restaurants, so allow me to keep it real with y'all for just a second.

Over the weekend,  I received a distressing phone call from someone,  which left me feeling upset and very disempowered. This led me to think about some of the reasons why even as an adult with an empowerment blog, I am still overly sensitive,  concerned about others' opinions of me and often times super hard on myself,  particularly when I feel I have screwed up, in any area of my life.

After much thought, and long conversation with my fiancé, I figured that the main reason for these feelings of disempowerment is down to childhood conditioning. Many of the "good traditional values", or well meaning lessons that our parents instilled in us whether we like it or not has affected the way we reason and behave as adults. Oftentimes for the good, sometimes not so good. 

I come from a good ol' Ghanaian, Christian background where there is a lot of emphasis on  "God first"  and "respect for others". But there is also a lot of "mask wearing", and tiptoeing around others so not to appear less than squeaky clean. 

Although my upbringing has helped me to become a highly spiritual, respectful and hardworking member of society, they have also in some ways been to my detriment, So I have compiled a list of five "good traditional values"  that I believe have contributed to the way I act now, and have been my setback as a woman, and that I feel should be shaken off if I am going to progress in life. Whilst I am writing this for you, I am also writing this for myself.  In the words of one of my favourite gospel songs "as I minister to you, I minister to myself".  So let's learn together. 

1. What people think about your life choices is a reflection of whether they are wrong or right.

2. Answering back to someone older is disrespectful. Never do it. (This has been a major one, that has even hindered me from standing up to my superiors at work!)

3. Taking a break / rest = laziness

4. Good Christian (*insert alternative label here*) girls don't make mistakes. If you do, then said mistake should be followed by excessive regret and apologising to those who may or may not be affected.

5. Crying is silly. It's a sign of weakness and you must not let anyone EVER see you cry.

This is by no means an exhaustive list, but these are the main beliefs I feel I subconsciously hold, although I find it hard to admit it.  

If you have read to the end, I would like to thank you.  I would also like to encourage you by saying that you are most probably doing better than you think. If you do feel you have screwed up in life lately, then do what you can to fix it, leave the rest to God, forget about it and move on!

Can you add any more to my list. What "good traditional values"  are you trying to shake off?"

Bouncing back from the sack! (My personal story)

Have you ever been laid off from a job? It’s not the best feeling is it? I can definitely relate to the feelings of rejection and sometimes shame that come with being told that your services will no longer be needed and that you are to clear your desk as quickly and as quietly as possible. Firstly, your source of (financial) security has been snatched away from you. Secondly, it seems as if your skills and abilities have been seriously undermined, and thirdly instead if being deemed a human being with a family, feelings and responsibilities, you have been treated like a simple redundant digit that should be cut off in order for the books to be balanced. Trust me girl, I know.

I have decided to write on this topic today because although, I have not been sacked, I have experienced a lot of upheaval at work recently, which reminds me of a particular episode that occurred six years ago.

In fact, it was around this time of year in 2010, I had just begun my first “grown up job” with a PR company in Waterloo in London (Oooh, I SO want to name and shame, but I probably shouldn't!). In fact, it was an internship which later on developed into paid work, so you could imagine my excitement. I hastily quit my customer service job at a well known womenswear company and irrationally turned down a much coveted internship. It all seemed like a good idea at the time, except, after two months I found myself sitting opposite my then manager, and being told “I just don’t think that this company is the right fit for you”

I was told to leave as quickly and as quietly as I can, and to basically not cause too much fuss (it was all very underhand, but at the time I was too timid to challenge my employer). Back then, I was younger with little experience of the cut throat culture that is sometimes at the core of the working world. With my wide eyed innocence, I had not yet learned to put on my big girls trousers, so I simply left so not to cause further offence. I  remember sobbing my little heart out as walked down Waterloo Bridge Road, not giving a care to the strange stares I was attracting.The resulting feelings were those of sadness, rejection, guilt and embarrassment at my perceived failure. 

So when this year, a few work related occurrences threatened to knock my confidence again, I made up my mind to not be subdued by the drama, but to rise above it. If you are going through the same, or similar situation, here is how I overcame those negative feelings, and you can too!

1. Know that there is a plan and a purpose for everything. 

It sounds cliché, but it is true. When I got laid off from the PR company, job hunting became inevitable. I prayed so hard to God to turn the mess into a stepping stone. Besides, the £55 a week I was getting from the government as Jobseekers Allowance paled in comparison to my bills and  love for having a generally good time. So, my search eventually led me to the company I currently work at. A company I have now been with for almost six years, which has allowed me to refine my French speaking skills and to travel a lot more than I otherwise would have.

2. Read positive literature.

I used to be such the cynic when it came to motivational books. However, I have picked up a few in the last few months as well as read some online articles that have helped me to channel my negative thoughts and feelings into positivity. It has also helped to open my eyes to the opportunities around me and to develop a craft outside of traditional employment. 

3. Don’t get sucked into pity

It's easy for well meaning friends and family to pull you into a pool of pity and to indulge your sadness for longer than needed. Don't misunderstand me, you do need your time to scream and cry. However, staying in that place for too long will prevent you from moving on. Make up your mind to respond positively to any negative comments and be mindful of the conversations you entertain.

4. Take what you have learned from your job, and make one hell of a killer CV

When my colleagues at the PR company learned what had happened, one of them kindly offered to email me all the press releases I had written, and the other materials I had produced. Granted, this might have been a breach of all sorts of company policies, but at the time I could care less! All that mattered was that I was armed with what I needed to impress the next potential employer. You may not go the the lengths that I did, but it does help to keep a record of every project you have been a part of, as well as every new skill you have acquired.It's also a good time to learn from your mistakes. Could you have perhaps put in more effort? Could you have attended a few more social events?

5. Network! Network! Network!

It's good to keep in touch with any contacts you have made in your industry. Begging or desperation is never a good look, but you could always mention in passing that you are "looking for a new opportunity". When it comes to social networking, think about how you'd want to be perceived by others, a.k.a. your personal branding. These days, prospective employers look to professional networking sites like LinkedIn to make decision on who to recruit, so make sure your profile is up to date! They also look at more informal social sites such as Facebook and Twitter so be careful about what you post!

I hope this post has been of help. Chin up dear. There is light at the end of the tunnel. Don't throw in the towel, just continue to be the best you. Someone WILL take notice!

What are some of the ways you have bounced back from the sack?

Have a wonderful August!

Happy Birthday Souljourners!

Happy Birthday to us!

Today marks SoulJourner's Story’s one year anniversary. Whilst yesterday was spent in Paris, taking clients to see the very exclusive Maison de Pierre Hermé, and sampling delicious macaroons,  on the 15^th day of May one year ago, it was the last day of my one year contract at my previous job. Recent tensions in the office had been grating on me. I was exhausted, but also relieved to be finishing, and excited. (I was going to Las Vegas to celebrate my birthday the following week). That day for me, marked the conclusion of a long awaited last chapter, but I was also on the cusp of something new and exciting.

Luxurious, hand crafted macaroons created by celebrated chef Pierre Hermé

I remember, the weather being glorious, and as I walked out of the office block and towards the London underground, I guess I felt like a freed prisoner seeing daylight for the first time. It didn’t matter that I was saying goodbye to the comfort of routine I had become accustomed to, or that I didn't know what next my professional life would offer. In fact I couldn't care less. All that mattered was that I was ready to embark on the next adventure. And that adventure was Souljourner’s Story.

Pierre Hermé also creates beautifully rich chocolate tarts

I had stories, experience, words of encouragement, ramblings and musings brimming on the inside of me, and I was in a hurry to pour it all out, to turn them into blog posts, and to share them with would listen read. I wanted to have a voice. I wanted to change my life.  And so, once I reached my stop I rushed off my train, walking briskly and  avoiding all the idle perambulators until I got home. Once inside, I turned on my laptop, opened Word and for a second didn’t know exactly what to say, or where to begin.

Enjoying the sunshine on the balcony of the Maison de Pierre Hermé

“How about you start by introducing yourself?”, a thought rang in my head.

"Hello World", I cautiously typed. It sounded like an OK place to begin. So I continued, and by the time I had finished, I felt like I had begun the process of unburdening myself for the first time, in what felt like ages. The next day, I transformed that word document, into Souljourner’s Story’s first blog post.

Heart shaped feature inside the creative space of Pierre Hermé

Since then, Souljourner's Story has continued to educate and encourage. We haven’t always got it right, but we have always come from a good place. Sometimes, it has been exhausting, and even frustrating. But I have learned loads on the way, and have formed some great relationships with a handful of my beautiful “blogging sisters”. 

I have both squealed in excitement at blog posts that have been unexpectedly popular, and cried over the times a “cut and paste” job has gone wrong and lost all my hard work!

One thing for sure is that it’s you readers and commenters (both negative and positive) that have given me the zeal to keep going.Thank you so much for clicking through, reading, following, commenting and sharing.  God bless you all. We are definitely not finished yet. Watch this space!

Pierre Hermé's book collection

I leave you with this

First Blog post: Hello World

Most popular : Organising Your Team Christmas Dinner?

Least popular (lol!): Closed Doors, New Beginnings

Most controversial: Four things we could all Learn fromDonald Trump

My personal favourites (I have two!): Study Time: Five Scriptures to Encourage the Young Professional and Commuter Reads: Foreign Gods, Inc

What are your Q1 Results?

Praise be to God almighty! Winter has finally loosened its cold grip on life and has allowed Spring to poke its dainty foot through the door! Admittedly it has still been a little cool, BUT I have noticed that for some time now the evenings have been getting lighter. When the clocks went forward over the weekend I knew it was curtains for harsh, cold Winter.

How has 2016 been for you so far? Are you sticking to your new year’s resolutions? Are you on your way to achieving any goals set at the top of the year?

The end of March  signifies the end of the first quarter of the year, or "Q1" as most businesses refer to it. If you have been paying close attention to business news, you will have noticed that many companies released a statement of their Q1 results this month, and will do the same for Q2 (April to June) and Q3 (July to September).

As the core principle of most companies is to make a profit, these quarterly results will contain a detailed analysis of their earnings and other business performance measures.

Reviewing the year so far is so important as it is a good indication of how the rest of the year will go (whether good or bad) if current trends continue. It also presents companies with an opportunity to make any necessary financial and commercial adjustments if necessary, so they can hit any targets they have set for themselves.

Taking time to reflect every so often  is good for all of us, not just trading companies.  It may not be a financial analysis, but you can weigh what you have acquired in the past three months and how it has added to your value, be it experiences, friendships, knowledge or even a new attitude to life.

It’s NOT an opportunity to lament over resolutions already broken or things you haven’t done yet, but a time to celebrate what you have achieved so far, and to take stock of any “adjustments” you may need to make in order to put you back on the right track, if you feel you have veered off it.

For me, the first three months have been super busy. My fiancé and I have been heavily investing time, money and energy in a few projects, and whilst we have suffered a temporary knock in these areas, we do hope "projections" will go up in the future. Sorry if this does not make much sense for now. I do hope to be able to share more in my "Q2 results". 

So, my question again, what are your Q1 results?

A round up of the year so far in pictures

Just In Case!

Hi all

I don’t want to do too much talking today. But I do feel that this post is important. Simply  because most of us, on work days, spend most of our waking hours at our offices or places of work than we do in our own homes! So it’s important to ensure we are “well stocked”

Whether you have ever faced the aggravating situation of your tights laddering in the middle of the day, or have had to run back out onto the shop floor to serve customers after a lovely salad drenched in garlic dressing, I am sure you can agree with me that having your drawer or locker stocked with a few essential items is a very good idea.

Sometimes, your manager might ask you to attend a client event at very short notice, and if you're the kind of person who cannot say 'no', you'd want to make sure you have everything you need to freshen up!

I hope you enjoy viewing these pictures, and hopefully it will give you some ideas on some of the items you should perhaps keep at your place of work, “just in case!”

What are some of the items you feel should go in your work survival pack?

Organising Your Team Christmas Dinner?

The past week has been somewhat super-busy! There has been a little bit of stress trying to get boxes of branded goodies shipped to Asia in time for a trade fair. I have been lugging heavy boxes around and staying late to greet clients. Not only that, I have been charged with organising our team Christmas lunch. And it is such a big team too! No wonder my body finally folded on me over the weekend and I am now suffering from a nasty cold.

A winter warmer to chase the sniffles away

At church, I am also organising a team dinner for myself and my Sunday School colleagues. Surprisingly, this is probably the more difficult one to set up. I won't go into the reasons why, just in case any of them are reading this!

I would like to share with you what I have learnt through the organisation process of Christmas dinner. These tips can be applied to your work lunch (or dinner), your church dinner, or simply a nice meal for your group of friends.

1. Always find out from your boss or finance team how much budget you have at your disposal. This is always important as it helps to narrow down your options. Also you don't want to find the perfect restaurant or catering company, only for it to be turned down by your boss. If organising this for your group of friends, how much is everybody willing to put in?

2. For most work teams, the date will have been already written into the annual calendar. But if this is a team lunch for friends, you will need to find the date that best suits the majority of your group. You won't please everybody but you might want to think of the people who bring life and energy to your gatherings , or the person who best gels the team together. Will your date suit that person? It's probably a ruthless way to look at things, but you do want to enjoy a pleasant and fun gathering, so looking at who will be able to make it is equally as important.

A thank you gift from my manager, for all the hard work

3. Research your options. For me this was the difficult part as you need to find options that will cater to everybody's needs. A good way to do things is to pick three of your favorite restaurants and present them to your boss, or to your team and get them to cast their votes. The factors to consider when researching your options are, does it meet your team's budget? For those in your team with special dietary requirements, do their menu include vegetarian and pescatarian options? What other dietary options do you need to consider? Are your options in locations that everybody can get to? If not, you may want to think of organising overnight stays. If you are stuck on where to look try googling "open table".

4. Before you commit to any one restaurant or caterer, make sure you clear with them how they would like to be paid. Is it by purchase order? Or by credit card? Do they require a deposit? Make sure you find out all of these and also ensure that the preferred method of payment is OK for your finance department. This part is VERY important.

5. And there you go. Make your booking! Inform your team of all the details. Make sure they know the closest train/tube stations to the location, and other public transport that serves the area. You might even want to agree on a meeting point first before making you way over to the restaurant together. If you are dealing with a group where lateness is rife, you may want to be a little dishonest with your meeting time. (ssshhh!)

Stems cut, nicely arranged in a vase

6. Enjoy your lunch or dinner! As an afterthought what entertainment other than the food have you organised for your team? You may want to do a secret santa. Or book an evening of karaoke or a round of drinks for after dinner. Take a look at points 3 to 5 again to help you through the process.

Wherever you decide to eat, remember that organisation and communication with your team is the key. Have a wonderful Christmas dinner, you and your team!

http://fmlight.com/

Money Talk: Lessons Learnt (Part 2)

Bienvenue à Paris!

This weekend was another working weekend spent taking yet more clients to some of the top hotels in Paris. As the host to 30 clients I must say it was somewhat knackering, but hey, no complaints from me. Firstly, I get to see some fantastic places, and secondly I believe this job is a blessing from God so only gratitude here.

Speaking of work, as young professionals we are often thought of as having plenty of disposable income by virtue of our fancy job titles. After all we work don't we? Many of us have no kids and therefore no responsibility, so what could we possibly be doing with all our money? At SoulJouner's Story we understand that being a young professional does not necessarily mean loads of money in the bank. For starters, a lot of us are still paying off our student loans, and let's not even start with the season train ticket! BUT this blog is the positivity zone, and we like to offer solutions that will enrich your life. 

La folie à l'hotel 

These tips are not the usual, 'don't spend more than you earn' lark, but is advice that is specific to my experiences.

So here is part two of Money Talks: Lessons Learnt.

1. ALWAYS read the small print. I can't stress this enough. Signing on the dotted line before establishing the facts can be very expensive. In 2011, I made a provisional booking for coach hire for a trip I was organising for my youth group. This meant that they had my card details but had not charged me anything yet. The trip got cancelled for reasons I couldn't control. Simple, right? Except, when I tried to cancel my provisional booking with coach company, I was told it was too late to cancel, and that the company was going ahead with the £400 charge to my card. What a massive blow.

Un petit morceau a manger

2. Whether by diary, post-it notes or reminders on your phone, ALWAYS make a note of due dates for bill payments and subscription 'cancel-by' dates. My last point is a case in point example.

3. Do not lend money you couldn’t afford to live without if it were not to be paid back on time, or at all. (On the flip side, do not borrow money you know you will not be able to pay back). This was a lesson I learnt thanks to an ex boyfriend of mine. A few years ago, when I was a little less wiser than I am now, I lent a man I was in a relationship with a sum of money. (No need to disclose the amount) I struggled to figure out how I'd make ends meet that month, besides it was quite a sum! But, he asked nicely and promised that payback would be prompt and without protest, and so I obliged. You see where I'm going with this...

Le pain quotidien

4. Do not bury your head in the sand! I have no specific example to tie to this point. However, I can say that there are times when I have been too busy to open the envelope from my bank, or even too scared to after after too much spending. This never helps, as you deny yourself control over your finances.Worst still, you may withdraw more than you have in your account or exceed your overdraft limit, which will only result in more charges! Keep track of your finances. There are some banking apps that can even alert you if you are approaching your limit. Find out!

As I said these are all my own from my personal experiences and I am not a qualified financial advisor. If you are in serious financial trouble or would just fancy some advice from a professional, you should consult the likes of Money Saving Expert or The Money Advice Service. If you'd like to read part one of Money Talk, please click here. I will conclude this series with SoulJourner's Story's Moneyfesto©, so keep your eyes peeled!

On a last note, what do you all think about the government offering universities the opportunity to raise their tuition fees above the £9000 a year they are currently charging?

Merci beaucoup!